Friday 30 January 2015

Off to University


Our eldest, Sarah, is about to leave home.  Not only to leave home but to trek miles and miles away where her next visit home will be between term times.  I was (I thought) quite well adjusted to the fact when I thought she was going to a university 3-4 hours away and would be home on weekends.

Now I am sure that I am not even remotely ready to let her go.  After 18 years of seeing this day coming – I am not ready for it.  Is any parent ever ready to let their children go?  Sure we look forward to getting our life back.  But then after 18 years – can you even remember what life was like BC?  Do you really want to go back there?

I was speaking to my father and he offered words of wisdom – as only fathers can.  In between bouts of being my dad, goading and belligerent – but that’s another story.  He said that as time goes on he realises that as a parent you are just privileged to share your life with your children for a short period.  Well that wasn’t the exact words that he said – but something to that effect.

Having now pondered those words overnight – how true they ring.  I look at my daughter and the beautiful person she has become and I am amazed.  I am incredibly proud of the beautiful people all my children are growing into.  But now I have a completed model.  And when I look at her and who she has become, I become aware of how little influence I really have over who she is.  She has enormous traits and talents – which are all her own.  Like a flower that has been planted and nurtured and grown and is now in full blossom.  But like a flower, all I did was (slight pause here while I adjust my voice to match Neil of the Young Ones) plant the seed. (Okay that was a terrible line but stick with me on this analogy).  I then grew the seed, but all the attributes of the flower were always in there.  She has amazing musical talent, amazing empathy with people around her, amazing skills in writing, amazing confidence and many, many more personal assets. These are all things that I don’t think have come from me at all.  All that I did was provide the elements for her to blossom and shine, and to share her journey of growing up.

Now that all the hard work is done, all I need to is to sit back and watch in awe as her life unfolds.  And hope that she continues to allow me to continue to share her life with us.

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